文章讲述了作者如何引导孩子重拾写感谢信的习惯。作者从小被父母教导感恩的重要性，并传承给了自己的孩子。然而，随着孩子长大，他们开始觉得写感谢信是件麻烦事，甚至产生抵触情绪。作者一度因为忙碌而放松了对孩子的要求，却发现孩子们开始变得理所当然地接受礼物。为了重新培养孩子的感恩之心，作者规定孩子必须在收到礼物后写感谢信才能使用礼物。这一举措有效地让孩子们重新重视并习惯了写感谢信，并逐渐表现出更强的感恩意识。

📝 父母的言传身教是培养孩子感恩习惯的关键。作者从小被父母要求写感谢信，并将这一习惯带入自己的家庭教育中，强调感恩是重要的社交礼仪。

📉 随着年龄增长，孩子可能会觉得写感谢信是件枯燥乏味的任务，甚至产生抵触心理，尤其当周围同龄人普遍不这样做时，这种抵触情绪会更加明显。

💡 重新建立规则是有效的教育手段。当作者将“写感谢信”与“使用礼物”挂钩后，孩子们迅速改变了态度，积极地完成了写感谢信的任务，表明明确的激励和约束能引导行为的改变。

💖 即使是简单的感谢信，也能培养孩子的感恩意识。作者发现，写感谢信这一过程能让孩子反思他人的付出和善意，从而提升了他们的感激之情，甚至在无提示的情况下表达感谢。

🌟 培养感恩之心是一个持续的过程，需要家长的耐心引导和坚持。作者希望孩子们能够内化感恩的价值观，即使在无人监督的情况下也能保持感恩的态度。

I grew up being told the importance of writing thank-you notes.My children began resisting the task, seeing it as tedious and unnecessary.Now, they must write thank you notes before they are able to play with or use any gifts they get.

My 10-year-old son happily waved goodbye to his friends as they left his birthday party. Once they left, he tore the wrapping paper off his gifts, while I carefully made a list of which friend had given him which present.

After giving him time to inspect each present and a little prompting, I led him over to a stack of construction paper and crayons to start writing thank-you notes. He rushed through the task, talking about all of the funny things that happened at his party, and got the job done. But it wasn't always this way.

My parents always made me write thank-you notes

When I was growing up, my parents were adamant that I learned how to show gratitude. They taught me to always thank my friends' parents when they invited me over for a playdate and I was instructed to model my parents' behavior and thank the server who brought my meal when we went out to eat.

As soon as I learned how to write my name, my mother had me sign thank-you notes she had written on my behalf to the generous friends and family who bought me gifts for my birthday or the holidays. Eventually, my mother sat me down and taught me how to craft thank-you notes, always including something personal about what the gift meant to me. It is a habit I have carried into adulthood.

My children wrote thank-you notes willingly when they were little

When my children were still toddlers, I tried to instill in them the same habit of writing thank-you notes.

Each time they received a gift, I asked my children to scribble a drawing that we would give to the gift-giver. My children took this job seriously, and their early efforts at writing thank-you notes were warmly received. Once they learned how to write, they started expressing their thanks with short but heartfelt sentences. At first, they did so without hesitation. However, once a few years passed, getting them to write thank-you notes became a chore.

Eventually, they began to resist writing thank-you notes

As my children grew older, they began to question why they had to write thank-you notes. Very few of their friends wrote thank-you notes, and they found sitting down to write them tedious.

"If someone takes the time to get you a gift, you should take the time to thank them," I said. For a while, they found this argument convincing. Nevertheless, as time passed, they started resisting the act of writing thank-you notes again.

Between having four kids and trying to keep up with life and work, thank-you notes fell by the wayside. By the time my youngest child started having birthday parties at 3, I didn't bother trying to get him to write thank-you notes at all.

Every time one of my children received a gift, I felt a pang of guilt knowing my kids would not send a thank-you note in return, but I was too overwhelmed to do anything about it.

My children started to expect gifts, and I knew things had to change

At some point, my children began to feel entitled to gifts. They would sometimes complain if a gift was not as generous as they thought it should be, or if it wasn't exactly what they wanted. I was horrified by their lack of gratitude and decided it was time to reinstate writing thank-you notes as a way of reflecting on their good fortune and to reinstill gratitude for all that they have.

As expected, my children argued vociferously, insisting that writing thank-you notes was a waste of time. However, once I told my children that they would not get to use their gifts until they did so, they got on board quickly. Soon, writing thank-you notes became second nature again.

Writing thank-you notes has made my children more appreciative

Sometimes, I wish my children would write longer, more thoughtful notes. Nevertheless, even the act of writing a simple note of thanks has had a positive impact. Taking the time to reflect on someone's generosity and the expression of love or friendship involved in giving a gift is a valuable exercise in gratitude.

Sometimes, without prompting, they now thank me for taking them on vacation or on an outing they really enjoy like bowling or a visit to an escape room. My hope is that they continue to show, and reflect on, their gratitude even when I'm not looking over their shoulders.