少点错误 03月01日
Do clients need years of therapy, or can one conversation resolve the issue?
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本文作者分享了其通过独特教练方法帮助客户“一次性”解决长期困扰的经验。与传统疗法不同,这种方法不深挖过去,而是专注于当下和未来,强调“非学习”而是“非习得”,旨在快速有效地解决问题。作者通过案例展示了如何通过一次对话或引导冥想,帮助客户克服焦虑、成瘾等问题,并强调了合适的教练、客户和方法是实现“一次性”解决方案的关键。这种以结果为导向的模式,通过设置“赏金”来激励教练,确保客户满意度,并探索了“一次性”解决问题的可能性和未来。

💡**独特的教练模式**:作者的教练模式不深挖创伤或过去,而是专注于客户想要在当下看到的改变,强调“非学习”,而是帮助客户“非习得”那些阻碍他们前进的信念和习惯。

🎯**结果导向的激励机制**:作者采用“赏金”制度,客户在问题解决后支付预先设定的费用,这种方式激励教练尽可能高效地帮助客户解决问题,确保客户的满意度。

🧘**“一次性”解决方案的关键要素**:文章指出,“一次性”解决方案需要合适的教练、合适的客户和合适的方法相互配合。其中,客户能够积极应用所学,或者教练能够帮助客户彻底“非习得”问题,是实现快速解决的关键。

🔑**案例分析与问题类型**:文章通过多个案例,展示了如何通过一次对话或引导冥想,帮助客户克服焦虑、成瘾、社交恐惧等问题。作者发现,焦虑等情感问题比回避型问题更容易“一次性”解决。

🚀**“一次性”解决问题的未来展望**:作者的业务正在扩展,旨在以更深入、更有效的方式帮助更多的人。同时,作者也在寻找能够“一次性”解决问题的优秀教练,共同探索这种高效教练模式的未来。

Published on February 28, 2025 12:06 AM GMT

It took me months to outgrow my anxiety and depression. Afterward, I wondered, “How could this have taken hours instead?” This was my guiding light as I’ve learned how to help others resolve their chronic issues.

Warning: rest of this post is entirely about what I have the most data for (my own personal experience & business). Some commenters have said it reads like an ad. 

When I was considering offering coaching, I hated the common incentive structure: getting paid per hour of effort.

Most coaches get paid more the longer it takes you to resolve your issue… I couldn’t take part in a system where the incentives were so misaligned.

It also felt wrong to take money from clients if their life didn’t actually improve.

So when I started my business, I made payment contingent on results:

Set a bounty on resolving your lifelong procrastination, anxieties, or stubborn issue. Work with us, pay your bounty when you feel satisfied.

This incentivizes us to help you resolve your issue as efficiently as possible. If we can resolve your issue in “one shot” (one conversation or intervention), we will! The goal is results, after all.

Our clients are often surprised at how we do things because it’s so different than the therapy or other coaching they’ve done before:

So are we successful? Can one conversation resolve your issues when other methods have failed?

Several of my clients have resolved lifelong issues like anxiety in one shot— even though they had previously tried years of therapy, coaching, or meditation. This doesn’t usually happen, but when it does it’s very cool and I hope to get better at it.

Conversation and guided meditation can be extremely effective when the right coach and client come together. (Edit: No psychedelics were used stop asking!!)

Examples below.

1/ Before: 8 years of talk therapy

I spoke to somebody for 4.5 hours one day, and 6 months later they still report being far less anxious and far more agentic. After one conversation he achieved with me what he had been trying to achieve with nearly a decade of talk therapy.

 

The change was so drastic that people he met started describing him differently:

One of my new friends said, “You're so adventurous.” That shocked me… If you were to ask my high school friends, that’s not a word they would use.

He speaks at length about how his work, social, and dating lives have changed:

(I met this client at Manifest, a prediction market conference.)

Results: When he felt sure that the results were lasting/ weren’t temporary, he paid the 4-figure bounty he had placed to work with me.

(I emphasize bounties paid because they provide concrete legible evidence that the client was satisfied with their growth. Bounties reflect the value the client gains from working with us, not the effort we put in.)

2/ Before: Talk therapy, CBT, and IFS

The first person I ever tried to help with my techniques had previously tried talk therapy, CBT, and IFS. When we met at a CFAR reunion in November 2023, I tried to help him address his emotional reactivity. Our conversation lasted 3 hours. We also spoke for another two hours in August 2024. In October 2024, he said:

I used to get triggered by very small things that some of the people surrounding me would say or do… These things would incapacitate me for 48 hours, I would have to shut myself in my room. Now I just laugh…

This wasn’t exactly “one shot”, but I think it’s close enough and I happen to have a detailed interview with him. He talks about his life has changed and how he grew so much:

Read on for reflections about what’s going on, and more examples of one-shotting:

How does one-shotting happen?

The right coach, the right client, and the right method can coalesce to create the conditions for a one-shot. I know of two ways one-shotting can happen:

1) The client learns how to coach themself

Both clients above talk about how they learned to do on their own what I did with them in the session. Then, whenever they encountered a trigger in everyday life, they untangled it themself.

This required substantial agency on their part to actively apply what they learned from me over and over again without prompting.

A more concrete example:

A client came with a multi-decade porn addiction. He had tried various internet blocking methods before (but no coaching, meditation, or therapy), but the problem persisted. In mid October 2024, we had a session lasting 1.75 hours where I taught him how to “try on the feeling” he wants instead when he feels the desire to use porn. Ever since, he’s used that skill when necessary. It’s a few months later now, and he rarely ever feels the desire to use porn.

Results: He is paying his 5-figure bounty over 3y.

2) The client “deeply unlearns” their issue

In other cases, a one-shot can occur by simply helping someone thoroughly unlearn their issue. When this happens, they almost forget they ever suffered from the issue.

This kind of one-shot requires the coach to help the client notice ~all of the places they might possibly run into blocks in the future, and then untangle them all in advance while still in the session.

For example:

A tech founder based in SF tried 2 years (~120 hours) of IFS therapy, retreats, and hundreds of hours of meditation to resolve his lifelong block on romance and attraction. Our first conversation lasted four hours, in which we found and unlearned his root issue (approximately: the self-loathing strategy). (I have no idea why I was able to help resolve this when hundreds of hours prior attempts didn’t, but here we are. This is common.) He slept a lot after the session and woke up with intense muscle soreness the next day, lol. Within two weeks he had comfortably asked out multiple crushes. He had never easily asked someone out before.

Which issues can be one-shot?

Who is ready for a one-shot?

Here’s what I know:

One-shotting can happen regardless of prior attempts to resolve their issue. Most cases on this page already tried years of coaching, therapy, and/or meditation before working with me.

These prior attempts can sometimes help build skills that set up the possibility of a one-shot. For example, it’s especially fun to work with skilled meditators because they zip through everything quickly.

That said, I definitely have not one-shot the issue of anyone who:

More one-shots

5/ Social anxiety

Previously he had tried most of the tpot meditation advice to resolve his multi-year social anxiety. Meditation alone did not resolve this. On September 30, 2024 we had a three-hour session:

Show tweet

And while we may have one-shot some specific parts of the issue, a few weeks later he had more complexity appear and we helped him some more. So maybe not a true one-shot, but it does hint at what’s possible.

Recently he told me “All going well on my end” and that he’s still using the techniques he learned on his own as necessary.

6/ One-shot by a tweet?

Here’s a fun example: Maybe sometimes all it takes is the right tweet?

I was actually going to coach Sarrah, but by the time I had time she said she didn’t need it anymore:

Show tweet

Misc. examples

Show tweet

There are more cases I either can’t share, don’t have detailed information about, or for which it’s too early to tell.

Have you ever had an issue one-shot?

Have you ever had a lifelong issue one-shot with effects still 6+ months later? Leave a comment or DM me or email chris@chrislakin.com, I’d love to hear about it.

Also: Do you know any coaches who can one-shot sticky issues? Please contact me if so. I’m always looking to send bounties to outstanding coaches. There’s a lot of people we can help.

The future of one-shotting

My business is expanding to help more people in deeper and more efficient ways. It’s a “we” now, and we recently switched our main technique to something new that looks less like “occasionally one-shotting a big issue in four hours” and more like “talking for an hour, then adhoc texts and calls over the following months”. Ironically, this new method is somewhat less amenable to one-shotting, even though I expect it to work deeper and take less total coaching time for most clients.

incentivealigned.com 

Thanks to Stag Lynn for reviewing.



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高效教练 一次性解决方案 结果导向 个人成长 心理辅导
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