Published on October 5, 2024 7:14 PM GMT
Damon Sasi (@DaystarEld) is a mentor of mine, and he is also a therapist who claims to be very psychologically healthy. What’s his inner experience like?
- “Probably for an average week, maybe I'll suffer for like five minutes”“I don't think I have any prolonged internal conflict”“Self-loathing to me was a weird concept […] Like, what does it mean to like self-loathe?”
It’s not that he had a great childhood, either.
[My childhood] wasn't terrible. And I say this and then maybe I'll give some examples and people will be like, maybe it was terrible. […] my parents divorced when I was pretty young. Both my parents, I think, were very absent. […]
He would get drunk often. He once hit me in the back with a two by four. My older brother was pretty physically abusive before he chilled out. And by chilled out, I mean like, we're cool now, but I left home after high school specifically to get away from him. […]
I think overall the experience I had growing up was just being very alone. I didn't feel like my parents were really my parents. I feel like books raised me in very strong and very real ways I could give examples of. I had a lot of friends. I enjoyed my friendships quite a lot, but I didn't feel like I had family, basically at all. […]
What is it like to be psychologically healthy?
I don't think I've ever hated anyone ever in my life. Possibly this is not true for like very brief moments or brief periods of time or something and it's like hard to remember them. It's just really easy to like let go of hurt or anger against other people.
This is why I actually had to become very good at just forming boundaries when I was young. Like just very clear, very clear boundaries with other people because I just couldn't hold onto anger against them no matter what they did to me, which was like not great given my upbringing. […]
there was one occurrence in my entire life where I think I came closest to what people call depression […]
I've had little T traumas or hang ups or whatever word you want to use for them. But big T traumas just feel like they never happened in part because I never felt like I lacked agency in my life. […]
basically zero [Big 5 personality] neuroticism […]
Details in podcast.
https://chrislakin.blog/p/what-is-it-like-to-be-psychologically
Related posts: what becoming more secure did for me by @Chipmonk and How feeling more secure feels different than I expected by @Kaj_Sotala
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