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- When I first went to college, I thought I was missing out by not living in a dorm.Once I began teaching college classes, I heard horror stories my students shared about dorm life.I'm glad that I could focus on my studies instead of worrying about challenging roommate dynamics.
I wanted to move out when I was in college, even though the community college and then university I chose to attend were within forty-minutes of my family home. I desperately wanted the independence living in a dorm would have allowed me. Yet, even though I worked three jobs while attending school full-time, there was simply no way to make rent, or dorm fees, within reach.
Once I graduated college and moved on to graduate school, I began teaching my first college-level classes. What my students shared with me was eye-opening. Dorm life isn't nearly as fun and exciting as they make it seem in the movies.
The more my students confessed all of their roommate issues, the happier I became with my own decision to skip out on the dorm or off-campus apartment experience. Here's why, 25 years later, I no longer regret not living in a dorm.
Roommates can be a nightmare
Over the years, I had several students come to my class frustrated and exhausted. Because I teach writing classes, which tended to be about 20 students, we get to know each other well. They would confess that dorm roommates could be an absolute nightmare. I heard stories about how roommates would invite guests over for late-night (loud) sex, help themselves to the food they didn't buy, fill the space with smoke, or skip out on their agreed chores.
Some of my students even confessed that they felt they had to parent their roommates, keeping them (or getting them) out of trouble and even dealing with suspected mental health issues.
The cost is high
Dorm life is expensive. I chose not to go into debt to pay for a dorm or off-campus apartment simply out of practicality. I had a free place to live, eat, and sleep: home.
Students are generally provided the very basics like a bed, bathroom, desk, and closet space, in which, of course, they must pay rent for. However, absolutely everything else was on their dime. Bedding, towels, storage solutions, a microwave, a mini-fridge, and more came out of the student's pocket. These little things add up, and when I look back, I know this isn't something that I could have made work without going into debt.
Dorm life can be distracting
The point of going to college is to learn: learn communication and social skills, learn academic material, learn to navigate being more adult and less kid. Over the years, I've learned that dorm life for many of my students simply isn't zen enough to be conducive for learning.
Even if a student has a dream roommate, there are often many other students in the building with loud, messy, and overall disruptive habits. A lot of students go to school to party — and they do it quite well. Many of my dorm students were often tired from late-night noise, for example, which in turn, affected their ability to learn well the next day.
Though it may be a fine choice for some, it wouldn't have been right for me
I know college offers students new experiences, and sure, students can learn and grow from them. However, dorm life oftentimes isn't all it's cracked up to be, at least from what I've seen. The movies often glamorize dorm roommates throwing epic parties, snuggling in pajamas, and enjoying bowls of ice cream, or taking on a social issue together. Though the experience can be successful and maybe even build lifelong friendships, I am, looking back, thankful I lived and home and skipped out on the dorm experience.
