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- My daughter is interested in going to Arizona State University, so we planned a trip to take a tour.Her boyfriend and best friend came along for the weeklong trip, and I wasn't sure how it would go.It ended up being a fun vacation, and we all enjoyed our time together.
My daughter is studying criminal justice at community college, and after she gets her associate degree next spring, she wants to transfer to a four-year school. A few months ago, she found a forensic psychology program at Arizona State University, far from Maine, where we live. It's one of the few schools that offers a program in exactly what she wants to study, and she asked if we could go see the school.
The trip would be long and expensive, but my daughter had a 3.6 GPA after completing her freshman year. After working so hard, I felt she deserved a trip to see her potential future college. We sat down and worked together to plan our weeklong trip.
I worried it would be awkward
She wanted to bring two travel companions — her best friend since seventh grade, who was also interested in the program and goes to community college with her, and her boyfriend of several years.
I had hoped to bring a friend, but the timing and finances didn't work out for anyone I knew. So, it would be me and three teens heading across the country (2,742 miles, to be exact). What would I do with them? Would it be awkward? After all, I'm 50, they are 18, 18, and 19.
Luckily, my fears were unfounded. The trip I'd almost viewed as a chore became the vacation I didn't know I needed.
The kids were great to travel with
I was pleasantly surprised by the kids' attitudes — they were both fun and responsible the whole time. They still held onto the youthful excitement of traveling while also demonstrating impressive adult skills. They let me mother them, which is instinctually built into who I am, but they also treated me like a friend. We enjoyed day trips to a ghost town and toured the Arizona State campus during the day. At night, we grilled and went to dinner, or played games and swam in the pool.
They were also excellent housemates. My daughter's boyfriend found an Airbnb for us to stay at, and they cooked their breakfast each morning and paid their way, most of the time. I paid for our groceries for the week, even though they offered to split the bill into four quarters. I became the invisible, magical fairy who cleaned the kitchen before bed. I also drove them around because, legally, none of them were old enough to rent a car. We worked together as a team.
They helped navigate our trips on the roadways of Phoenix. I have been afraid of driving on the highway since I began driving in my late teens. They told me when to switch lanes and cheered me on as we navigated our rental across unfamiliar roads. They were also great travel companions on our flights, both there and back.
We did spend some time doing things separately. They gave me my space, and I theirs. One night, they swam and did karaoke while I watched a movie and read. When a personal dilemma occurred, they had my back in ways that were so adult and kind, and when my daughter's friend lost her wallet, she was responsible enough to figure out the steps to get it back. We all offered her support and helped her navigate its return.
Spending that week with them was a remarkable beginning to my summer. While the trip was not one I would have chosen as a vacation, I am grateful for it. There has even been talk of a return trip in the future, and I can't wait!
