Courtesy of Boram Nam
- Boram Nam has two kids and had difficult postpartum experiences with both.Her friends in Korea benefited from having dedicated care throughout the first six months.She founded a postpartum retreat, and later pivoted to focus on home care.
This as-told-to essay is based on a conversation with Boram Nam, founder of Boram Care. It has been edited for length and clarity.
My postpartum experiences with both my kids were very hard.
It took me years to recognize how challenging they really were and accept the fact that I likely had postpartum depression. At the time, I simply knew I was overwhelmed and overworked, walking around with engorged breasts that felt like rocks on my chest as I struggled with breastfeeding.
My daughter, who is now 15, was born when my husband and I were starting a company that distributed Korean television shows to the US market. Since it was a startup, I didn't have the luxury of a day off, and I returned to work immediately after she was born. I remember her crying while I was working and being so angry, thinking, "Why is that baby distracting me?" I wasn't able to celebrate my new life as a mom.
My son, who is now 11, had a C-section birth. The physical recovery was very challenging.
My friends in Korea had very different experiences from mine
I was born in the US while my parents were studying here, but I was raised in Korea. My kids were both born in New York, and we identify as Korean-American.
Around the time my son was born, my friends in Korea were having their first babies. Their experiences were so different from mine. Korea, like New York, has a fast-paced hustle culture. But there's a Korean saying that after giving birth is a time to walk slowly.
Moms go from the hospital to postpartum retreats, where they usually stay for two weeks. There are different levels of retreats, including some run by the government, and 84% of Korean moms go to one. They get three meals a day, lactation support, and childcare, which gives them the time to rest and recover. When they go home, they have structured support of home visits for the first six months postpartum.
My friends who had that support were thriving. They were able to ease into their new role as moms. Meanwhile, I was in the US without my village, feeling constantly cold and trying to heal my incision. My son vomited after each feed, so I had a designated puke shirt that just perpetually smelled like milky vomit.
We started a retreat, but found home care was a better fit here
It took me about two years to start feeling better after my son's birth. My husband and I had sold our streaming business, but wanted to stay entrepreneurs. We saw an opportunity to mimic the Korean model, providing postpartum support to new moms.
We opened Boram Care in 2022. We leased space in a New York hotel and provided moms with food, lactation support, postpartum doulas, and nannies 24/7. Some moms stayed for three nights, while others stayed longer.
I loved seeing the benefits for women, but there are so many cultural differences between the US and Korea. In Korea, postpartum retreats are normal and accepted — in fact, booking a retreat is one of the first things women do when they find out they're expecting.
The US doesn't have a widespread understanding of retreats. However, we're already familiar with home care for older people or small children via nannies. To better fit our American demographic, Boram Care pivoted to provide postpartum doulas, lactation support, and childcare in people's homes. I hope that eventually, this can lead to more accessible and affordable postpartum support.
I want to help women celebrate their postpartum experience
In Korean, Boram means "the fruits of one's labor." It's my name, of course, but it was also the perfect name for a business meant to help mothers enjoy and celebrate the fruits of their labor — their precious babies.
Postpartum support isn't a luxury; it's essential. Korean society understands that, and I hope that with time, the US will enact policies that show our society understands that, too. It's my dream that Boram Care will be one part of celebrating postpartum care workers and giving women the support they need.
